fun times and panic attacks

I've been busy catching up on work assignments since we got back from South Padre Island last Thursday and I'm almost up to date so I'll be posting all about our trip and sharing lots of photos etc over the coming week.  We had a brilliant time with lots of opportunity to unwind and refocus, and I'm looking forward to sharing it all with you in a new (and very exciting!) way.

One thing I briefly mentioned a while ago, but haven't touched back upon, is the topic of house-hunting.  Since Will and I moved to Austin without knowing anything about the area, we rented the place we're in now, to scope things out and find our niche.  While we love the area we're in, we've decided for various reasons that we aren't going to stay here.  It became apparent pretty quickly that we need to be close to Austin, but not in it.  So here we are.  Swiftly approaching the end of our lease (just three months to go, eep!) and looking at places outside of Austin's metropolitan zone!  This is very exciting for me since my whole life I've lived in big cities but at the same time, it's very frightening.  So frightening that yesterday I had somewhat of a panic attack thinking about moving 'into the county' and 'being remote.'

This will be my 10th move in 8 years.  Will has had a similar amount. Not all of those moves have been inter-city or major; but all have warranted moving trucks, lots of cleaning and rearranging furniture.  It will be my fifth major move into a brand new city where I know no one and that's always frightening.  I have hope that as we are buying our new place of residence, we may spread some roots there at last, I am weary of moving and anxious to build a home, yet simultaneously nervous about committing to a community we are unfamiliar with.

I often smile when I think of just how many of life's biggest decisions Will and I make based on our intuitions.  I know this makes little sense to many, but it has truly worked for us thus far.  Sometimes we feel different things - like yesterday when I let fear grip and shake me wildly, while he drove steadily on to our destination, unyielding and determined: his logical left-brain rationalizing the decision his gut has already made.  I admire that about him so much!  And while I'm not a fan of sexist stereotypes that dictate all men are logical while all women are emotional, in our case it holds true.  When we are deciding a massive, life altering choice - I truly take comfort in the constancy of Will's resolve.  Once he makes a decision, he rarely wavers on it, unless my gut is absolutely screaming NO!

Then again, that's the thing about soul-mates: you're usually intuitively connected.