this week's tip | open your mind

Do you believe in God?  Which God?  Vishnu?  Arianrhod?  Ahura Mazda?   Tsohanoai?

I believe in the faith of endless possibility.  To me, your God is as real as my own but so what?  Does what I believe really impact your life in any significant way?  Why are there people who always try to make someone understand things in their way?  Why is it important that you should agree 100% with me and I, with you?

My dad used to say 'leave the matters of faith alone for your heart to decide: it's a personal decision.'  That's resonated and stayed with me throughout my entire adult life, for I also believe we each have our own path that twists and turns us in its own way.  A way unique of any other that shows us different things and teaches us each a different lesson.  How could I ever possibly see the world the way a 50 year old man living on the Irish coastline would?  Or a 17 year old Somali girl?  Or Giorgio Tsoukalos?   Why are there some that think I need to?  Isn't faith meant to be a very sacred, personal issue to everyone?  Something that brings you comfort and bravery.  I mean honestly, what do you care who I'm praying to in the dead of night?  How does that touch your life at all?

The very idea of converting someone to your religion baffles me.  Mainly because no two people ever really interpret things the same way, but also because of how much one person can change over the course of their lifetime.  I've often heard Christians say that one Bible passage could come to mean two, or three, or even four different things throughout their own lives, depending on the reader's mood, situation, growth or change in life.  Which part then, would you try and make me see?

I dream of a world in which we are each secure enough in our own beliefs that we don't to try cramming them down the throat of anyone else; and not merely from a religious standpoint either.  A world in which government systems aren't so hell-bent on controlling every last one of us, that they feel the need to periodically fuel the hatred and underline the differences between us all.  A perfect utopia in which we are all open-minded enough to believe there is validity in every faith.

What I'm about to say isn't meant to sound like boasting, but I consider my own life as testimony that peace can be attained through open minds.  Consider me briefly:  I was born and raised Russian Orthodox in a communist society | despite a communist, atheist grandfather, who incidentally remains my most beloved relative | my mother is Baptist | my best friend is Baptist | I'm not sure about my bro exactly, but think he's somewhere between Christian and ancient-astronaut-theorist | I married a Methodist | moved to America where my closest friends became: (OMG) Muslims (what!), Greek Orthodox, transcendentalists, New Agers, Catholics and (sorry mama) atheists.  Oh, and can you believe I've somehow managed to befriend republicans and democrats (even a tea party enthusiast) alike?  It's baffling...or is it?  Because, in my opinion:  no one cares.  No one I want to be around, anyway.  My friends and I take each other at face value and leave personal beliefs alone, since we all believe you reached your own conclusions on purpose.      

It's so enriching to share your life experience with people from vastly different backgrounds to your own.  To discover how your silly buddy that makes you laugh so hard you get abdominal pain, can even have a sense of humour when he was raised in poverty in Bangladesh.  Or how your Iranian friend's entire family with Zoroastrian beliefs were simply told to convert to Islam and within a week had their homes stripped of any Zoroastrian book or artifact, who has legitimate reasons to despise Muslims, but doesn't.

It's an enormous world and I think it's fair to state that every 7+ billion of us have a unique perspective and personal belief.  I will never make you try and see the world through the eyes of a girl born in Kazakhstan during the Soviet Union era but grew up in Australia.  Nor could I ever fully adopt your point of view.  I do believe, however, that with an open mind we can empathize with each other and learn so much about what it is to live in this world.  Isn't that what we're here for?

Peace out.    

this week's tip | do something that scares you

After writing all about my public squid eating experience, I realized that doing something scary actually feels very rewarding afterwards!

For me, the self-conscious scenario of eating an unconventional food was made worse by the fact that I was sitting in a busy food court, alone, and already feeling exposed.  When you're eating out with somebody, you rarely notice anyone else and you don't really care about how messy you are.  But in lone-dining situations, I always find myself eating very carefully, tying not to spill or slurp.  In all honestly, my self-consciousness probably wasn't even about what I was eating, so much as the vulnerability I felt at having an audience.

It's not that I'm agoraphobic, or anthropophobic, but am I alone in feeling like I'm being stared at and judged when I eat in front of a bunch of strangers by myself?  Even if no one is looking!  It's a tense situation, I don't like how it feels and I try to find corner tables whenever I can... but having said that, I will own to feeling a triumphant sense of victory when I'm successfully done eating at a center table, then I can rise from the table and leave gracefully - without tripping, dropping anything or bumping anything!

This empowering, triumphant feeling makes it all worth it and it's why I repeatedly choose to eat in a food court or crowded restaurant, alone.  It's like a test for my confidence and a way to desensitize myself from that feeling of discomfort.  With frequent, successful experiences: I'm sure it's bound to work.  I'm bound to overcome this fear of dining alone - whether I spill everything, break the chair simply by sitting on it, or topple the whole table over.  Yep, eventually, it's bound to work.  And eventually, I'll stop picturing these types of worst-case scenarios!

In a moment of sheer zen, I envision myself casually sitting at a fancy, busy restaurant all alone.  I'm drinking red wine over a white table cloth and white summer dress, eating raw oysters, squid or anything else unconventional that I feel like.  I imagine the careless feeling within, that my grown confidence has bestowed and I see myself smiling as I remember how afraid of this exact scenario I used to be.  I can feel how wonderful it is.  I am chilled.  I have slayed that dragon, conquered something that used to terrify me and now I am cool, collected and chic.  I wish the same for you.

food for thought | squid

On Monday I went out for lunch and chose a squid salad because Will was nowhere in sight.  Had he been around, he would have cringed, pulled faces and made disgruntled remarks about how gross it was - and I wouldn't have enjoyed my yummy meal at all.   Yet as I sat at that WholeFoods table alone, with Will's repulsion in my mind's eye, I started wondering if people around me were having similarly disgusted reactions and felt very self-conscious.  Many people are grossed out by squid tentacles and as I became increasingly paranoid, I subtly glanced around to ensure no one was dry-reaching or holding their noses and pointing at me!    

It seems funny now, in the comfort of home, but it is quite a self-conscious scenario.  Australians and Americas alike are not the most polite when it comes to food etiquette: happy to openly reject something new, without trying it, and more than happy to belittle the eater!  I would have felt just as under-the-spotlight if I had suddenly reacted on a compulsion to strip down to my jocks and start dancing on the table!  As it was, I sat there trying to take big mouth fulls - desperately trying to avoid that dreaded tentacle-sticking-out-of-mouth scenario!  And I wished I had my very confident, very loud Greek friend beside me, eating her own squid salad and name-calling the haters!  Most European countries eat squid without flinching and it seems silly to care about the opinions of others... 

Eventually I did feel foolish and cursed Will for making me feel so paranoid about my choice in lunch.  I looked down at my delicious meal with the squishy, chewy texture I love so much and considered a world in which I cared so much about what others thought that I never ate squid again!  Nope - not worth it.  Sure, it has tentacles, which feel weird on your tongue.  Sure it's rubbery and takes a little work to break down... but to me it's worth it because the trade off is the taste of the very ocean!  Meaty, salty goodness: so high in protein, so low in anything bad!

My name is Lena.  And I lurve squid.  Deal with it. 

In its raw form: squid (purple, with tentacles) and
calamari (white tubes without tentacles)

this week's tip | how to avoid the 'petty purchases' conflict

Whether you're a young couple that's starting out in life like Will and I, or a couple that's on a budget; chances are, one member of the relationship wants pretty, new things more often than the other and feels the need to justify certain purchases from time to time.  In fact, this petty purchases conflict seems to be inevitable in most households no matter the relationship phase!

In our home, I'm usually the culprit or purchaser (surprised? I think not...) and my weakness and compulsion is things that make the house smell good, which are harder to hide than, say... a top (oh honey, I've had this for ages, you never notice! - sound familiar?).  I like to have a candle burning beside me whenever I write, read or have a bath and I light one at least once a week inside our wardrobe to keep our clothes smelling fresh.  Basically, Will knows the moment he steps a foot through the front door whenever I've spent money on fragranced candles, satchels or wax for the burners (especially if I change the scent!) and this is followed by a nice, lengthy conversation that goes a little like: "LENA!! Do we really need this right now? This is a rental for heaven's sake.  We're buying a house soon, you need to stop these petty purchases!"   :)

**My usual justifications include 'it's still cheaper than if I was a smoker,' 'studies have shown that clean smelling air is cleaner, period' and 'the place is old and smells bad without it.' **  - NB: I do not condone arguing!  Just saying.

I have found that his negative reaction is heightened when the house smells 'girly,' 'fuity,' or 'cakey.'  I also discovered, when I purchased a masculine-scented reed diffuser for his bathroom, that he didn't say a word about it!  Being a loving, caring wife, I decided to see if I could make him happier by switching out my favourite home scents for spicier, woodier, more masculine ones and, wouldn't you know it, I had positive results!  He definitely stopped complaining about me 'wasting money on things that smell like sh-' well bad!  And now he only grumbles when he notices a new (or different) candle standing on the coffee table or in my office - not the smell!

Now I've come to believe that you can avoid the petty purchases conflict (or decrease it at least!) by finding a balance between what you both like!  I'm lucky in the home scents department because there are so many fragrances available these days to please both male and female alike, but I believe with a little thought and experimentation, you can apply this to just about anything!  Maybe think about how the purchase is a good thing (does it increase your confidence etc) and convey that to your other half who may not understand.  Good luck!  I'd love to hear how it works out!  And I'd love to know what are some of your 'petty purchases?'      

this week's tip | eat veggies for breakfast

Ok, we're all super busy: working, travelling, taking care of our families (whatever shape they may take), trying to stay fit and meet personal goals as well!  There often just aren't enough hours in the day to fit everything and if you're like me, you're also plagued by that little voice in the back of your head telling you that you need to eat better while relaying your vegetable count for the day!

I used to feel the pressure every night having to fit the 7 vegetable/ 2 cup count into dinner because I ate oatmeal in the mornings and a variation of either a quick-snack, or nothing at all lunch!  Sometimes (especially in a rush) it was impossible to come up with a meal idea that incorporated veggies AND didn't take long to prepare, so I would cave and make a pasta dish without any veggies at all!  (spaghetti bolognese anyone?).  After a few close calls with my  head almost exploding, I decided to start my day with vegetables - making my usual quick-snack lunch easier to forgive and taking the pressure off dinner.

It's actually quite easy to eat veggies for breakfast. There are so many highly nutritional, quick and simple breakfast ideas around that keep you as full as oatmeal.  Here are a few:

1. an omelette: you can mix just about any vegetable into an omelette.  My faves are asparagus, zucchini, capsicum (red pepper), spinach and mushrooms!  
2. avocado toast: I like to lightly sprinkle mine with salt and pepper, yum yum yum! 
• It's easy to add more veggies to this - I like green capsicum (peppers), watercress and tomatoes (although technically not a veg).    
#127600441 / gettyimages.com


3. hash browns: these don't have to be oily and horrible!  Shred some potatoes (or sweet potatoes) into a frying pan of coconut oil, fry until brown and enjoy a healthy, guilt-free, trans-fat free treat!  One that you probably haven't had in ages! 
4. mushroom melt: if you work from home, or give yourself plenty of time to get ready in the mornings, you'll lurve this one!  It takes about half an hour to prepare but it's worth it.  I like to make this as a weekend breakfast for Will and I: it keeps us FULL! 
• You just need to preheat the oven, prep the mushroom (wash it, remove the stalk), fill it with whatever veggies (ham or other meat) you like, crack a small egg into it, sprinkle with cheese (opional) and bake for 15-20 mins. 
#158426913 / gettyimages.com


5. veggie smoothie: no better way to get all 7 veggies and two cups straight away than mixing a juice or smoothie.  The one pictured with this post is the Citrus Veggie Smoothie  from Santa Cruz Organic, where you can find many more delicious recipes! 
• Of course, smoothies don't keep you full very long so make sure to put a nut bar into your handbag on your way out of the door!

If you don't like the idea of being nontraditional, why not try a savoury oatmeal? Just grate in some carrots, cucumbers and add some nuts instead of the usual sweet cinnamon and fruit or whatever.  It's very tasty and you can find plenty of recipes online!

this week's tip | house hunting

As I mentioned in my last post, Will and I have decided to stay in Texas and make a home close to the Austin area.  We spent much of the first half of 2014 looking at neighbourhoods and house prices, trying to see what feels right and where we would be comfortable.  Now, with that finally agreed upon, we've spent the past week in full house-hunting mode!

As exciting as it is looking at various estates and houses, fantasizing about decorating and buying new things: there are a lot of frustrating aspects of house hunting too.  One of the most frustrating things for me is finding a house we really like, walking through it, liking it even more and then being disappointed for one reason or another.  Regardless of whether the disappointment comes from the house selling from underneath us, or because of structural issues or blah blah: every time I see a house / floor plan I like, I begin to envision our life there.  I imagine what every room will contain, I picture our existing furniture mixed with fabulous new pieces, I see the kitchen cabinets painted a certain way, what kind of landscaping would be done and even the letterbox!  It crushes me when my dream bubble bursts and I need to farewell my mental home! 

Granted, so far it's only happened twice, but to stop myself (and hopefully some other eager buyers too) getting carried away again, I've made a checklist based on months of experience and some advice from a couple of friends that are in real estate:    

1)  See a Seller's Disclosure Form!

Assuming this form is filled out honestly - it is major (hence being #1).  It contains all the information that the seller knows about the house: how old it is, what repairs or remodeling have taken place, whether any insurance claims have been made, whether anything needs repairing or replacing, and assuming appliances are included: how old they are plus warranty information etc.  

2)  Don't take their word for it

The Seller's Disclosure Form is a great beginning and will tell you things your real estate agent often can't, like whether the water is septic, or when the roof was replaced.  In an ideal world, everyone fills it out 100% honestly without omitting a single detail, but you never know what the seller's situation is - or how desperate they are to sell so it's always best to double check what they say.

3)  Professional inspection

This is where the professionals come in!  In most cases, they will be able to call baloney on anything that's misleading in the Seller's Disclosure form and they are vital for ascertaining that the foundation, roof, electric work and drainage are all sound.  Choosing a home inspection company can be daunting, but here's a detailed article I've found that helped Will and I narrow it down.

4)  Go along for the inspection! 
It actually amazes me that people don't.  Maybe I'm a total cynic, but I believe it's always best to see things for yourself and be part of a process that determines one of the biggest investments you make in your life.  Not that inspectors aren't trustworthy by any means - but I'd rather see any problems firsthand and immediately get their professional opinion about whether they're easy to fix or can eventually lead to larger issues.  Being present for the inspection will definitely help you get to know your future home and as you walk through the halls and rooms, receiving positive feedback from the inspector, feel free to start dreaming... <3  

This advice is for myself as much as anyone else!  Hopefully it will serve as a reminder before the next time I jump the gun and begin mentally moving into a place with (according to Will) obvious foundation issues!!  From experience, it's not worth getting excited purely based on the appearance of a house.  Sure, it ticks all the aesthetic boxes, but do you really want to live in a beautiful mess that's crumbling in around you? If so, you'd better have thousands of dollars spare to invest into repairs, because you'll never be able to sell it otherwise!

this week's tip | don't drink the water

One thing I absolutely, wholeheartedly recommend to anyone that wants to go on a trip is never drink the tap water!  I also think that people who frequently travel should get into a habit of either packing or buying bottled water along the way.

This doesn't only apply to third world countries - drinking foreign water is as much of a shock to your system as eating a foreign meal, even though its results are often less outwardly noticeable.  I can prove this by challenging disbelievers to a simple experiment: try taking all your usual shower products on your next trip and see if you notice a difference in the way your shampoo, soap, shaving gel, toothpaste etc lathers or rinses off.  I'll bet you do!  This isn't always simply because of water hardness (or softness) - this is often because of other chemicals added as well.

I noticed this when I moved to Atlanta - my conditioner was taking forever to rinse out, my teeth became sensitive and within the first couple of weeks my skin broke out badly!  Ironically, I got used to Atlanta's water after a while and my skin settled back down, only to return home to Aus for a visit where I broke out all over again after a shower!  Logically, if your bath products are performing differently and your skin is reacting, it stands to reason that internally you are reacting as well.

Personally, I am really strict about the water I drink.  In 2011, I got a kidney infection that had me hospitalized for three days, scared out of my wits and in more pain than I can describe.  When I asked the doctor what causes kidney infection, she told me that drinking straight tap water is often worse than not giving your system enough water AND that Atlanta's water reserve was on a calcium deposit so rates of kidney problems are very high in the city!!  From that point, everywhere we go I always wonder what water reservoirs are sitting on top of (or near) and never let even a drop of it touch my open mouth.  I've envisioned radioactive spills, or rubbish floating in the water and like Charlotte from the Sex and the City movie - who instantly got sick when she let some water in her mouth, I'd probably mentally give myself another kidney infection from the stress if I ever let any into mine!

At home we simply have a Brita filter jug that filters our drinking water and when we're out, I always buy still bottled water.  I never drink the water that's brought to our table when we're dining out - even if they say it's filtered, I just don't want to risk it.

Perhaps I'm overly cautious, but those who've had a kidney problem can attest to its horrifying, debilitating pain and will understand why I go to such lengths to protect myself from ever incurring another.  And for everyone else, this advice comes from the purest intent of my heart, simply to warn you and guard you against potential health disasters.  You don't really need to be as extreme as I am, just avoid foreign tap water!

this week's tip | succulents for summertime

I truly love the idea of growing plants.  My dream is to have mismatched pots scattered about the place with bright flowers and big, green leaves; filtering the air and cheering up the place.  Some of my earliest childhood memories from Kazakhstan are of my grandmother's flowers that were perched upon every windowsill in her downtown apartment.  Unfortunately the green-thumb that everyone else on my mother's side inherited skipped me entirely and left my own thumb looking a little blue.

This spring was a perfect example: I tried growing herbs with puzzling results!  My harder-to-grow peppermint, parsley and basil are all looking splendid; while my poor (apparently easy to grow) coriander, lemon balm and dill have seen better days.  Since I'm seriously lacking the aforementioned green thumb, I have no explanation as to why this could be - instead (logically) becoming upset every time a plant starts to die and taking it personally.

After some experimentation and a stubborn refusal to give up, I have found the perfect solution for the plant-challenged like me: succulents and cacti!  For one thing, they look amazing as summery accents with my Southwestern decorating scheme; especially in rustic clay or (my fav!) talavera style pots. And for another, they're virtually impossible to neglect - only requiring one watering per week (a very small one in the case of the cactus) and very occasional re-potting!

I purchased my very first succulent, a Jade plant, shortly after moving to Austin in October last year and am happy to report it's doing very well :)

Recently I purchased two more that look like flowers - one to sit on the coffee trunk and another for a side table:

Bright Kilim rug coming soon! 

My prized prickly pear cactus was, as many of you know, a souvenir from our Xmas in the desert.  

In case you need more convincing, or have a green thumb and can successfully grow many plant varieties, I have linked up some ways in which my fave bloggers use succulents for decorating: Cupcakes and Cashmere, Sincerely Jules, a Beautiful Mess.

Now that I've finally found the plants for me - my plan is to buy several more, plant them in gold, silver and talavera style pots, then scatter them about the house to see if I can make my plants-everywhere dream come true!  Wish me luck and try one out for yourself!  They're the perfect summertime plant and would even make a great hostess gift :)

PS: The myth is that succulents need a lot of light, but when I worked in the J.Crew bridal office we had a Jade plant that grew on our bookshelf without any windows at all!  Artificial light was enough.

PPS: A cactus is technically a succulent too!

this week's tip | try drinking warm lemon water

I've had a few people lately asking me whether I've lost weight and although I have lost a little, it's not significant enough for it to actually be noticeable.  When I examined my past and present photos, I realized it's because I'm toning up that people are noticing and remarking.  My secret?  Simply drinking a cup of warm lemon water first thing every morning!

I started drinking lemon water about two months ago, after (my idol) Gisele Bundchen posted the recommendation on her Instagram, claiming that it boosts the immune system, balances ph levels and aids digestion.  Well I didn't need to be told twice and since then I've noticed several wonderful things.  Firstly, despite not changing my diet or exercise regime at all - I'm toning up!  Secondly, I feel more energetic - often not needing a cup of coffee afterwards!  Thirdly (which might be aided by my coconut oil pulling) hangovers are a thing of the past!

Drinking warm lemon water is easy!  The more lemon you can stand, the better: some people (Gisele Bundchen) squeeze an entire lemon into their water, others do half.  As for me, one third of a lemon (two thick slices) is all I can stand to comfortably drink and I believe it's enough to start reaping visible benefits.  I just muddle the slices in the bottom of my mug to release the juice and nutrients from the rind, then pour boiling water over the top and wait several moments for it to cool before drinking it as fast as I can.  It tastes great and has many other benefits, but don't take my word for it!  Here are some of my favourite articles on the topic, or you can do a lemon water google search for yourself.

Lemon water can improve your morning (and day) by the Huffington Post Canada

10 Benefits of drinking warm lemon water by Tasty Yummies

An incredibly effective, no diet/ no fasting, lemon detox by Pure Inside Out

11 Benefits of lemon water you didn't know about by Life Hack

this week's tip | use all five senses for the best travel experience

at Hyde Park, Sydney

To get back into the swing of dishing out advice, I thought I'd recommence my weekly tip segment with a topic I'm almost a pro at: travel.  This particular tip comes from the bottom of my heart because I sincerely believe you will make the most out of every place you visit if you take it (and it's simple): walk, don't drive. 

When you walk around, all five of your senses are engaged in the experience, allowing you to get the most out of it and cement it in your memory.  Driving past, through or over famous landmarks will never give you the same feel as if you walk them!  When you're out there amongst it all is when you get the chance to hear and smell the city and its vibe.  You feel the ground beneath your feet and the air as it grazes your skin.  You are free to pause for as long as you like to admire or photograph something you see.  And there's always a much greater chance of stopping along the way to touch artifacts and taste local snacks or drinks!

To me, driving through a place is almost like watching it on TV.  Sure, you see the landmarks just fine and can take a snapshot, but trust me: without smelling, hearing, tasting and touching things along the way, you're getting hardly anything out of your visit.  And you'll forget it all anyway!  Luckily Will, who used to be a drive-by-er, has come around to my way of travelling :) Now whenever we visit somewhere new, we look for a hotel in a central location, drop our things off and go exploring on foot.
Without walking around places, we never would have experienced so many of the wonderful memories we've made, like when we:

• discovered the piano player in Manhattan's Washington Square Park
• got spontaneous upper lobe piercings in Queensland's Surfer's Paradise
• stumbled across an Hounfour that spooked us out of our brains in New Orleans!
• rescued a sea turtle on the Great Barrier Reef...

Just to name a few!  

pushing my luck in New York's East Village

meeting the locals at German Festival, Mt Tamborine QLD

this week's tip | make a 'done it' list instead of a 'to do' list

janemcmaster.wordpress.com

I'm a lists-girl.  Always have been.  Lately though, I seem to be struggling with time management, rarely being able to tick off every item on my daily list.  My routine has always been to make a to-do list for the following day before going to bed at night but lately I keep re-writing the same pesky items that just aren't getting done and then berating myself for them.

Last night, after Will had gone to sleep and I was still up tidying the lounge room, loading the dishwasher and all those other wifey things we need to do before settling for the night, I found myself gritting my teeth at the prospect of tomorrow when I would have to attempt to fit in all the list stuff again.  What had I done all day today, I wondered angrily as I do every other night, that had prevented me from sweeping the front deck or hand washing the dedicates that had now accumulated to max capacity?  So this time, I made a list.

Once I'd actually written down and looked at all the things I had done, I felt much better.  Let me list the things I learnt from this exercise, turns out: 

1. it wasn't a wasted day at all 

2. I had actually done a lot - a few things were spontaneous that needed immediate addressing and weren't on the list, so I didn't give myself credit for them

3. to-do lists can be more a hindrance than a help

4. once it becomes absolutely imperative for me to sweep the deck or wash things I WILL

5. I should give myself more credit

6. there's truth in the saying there just aren't enough hours in the day

Case and point: lists don't prioritize, they guide.  Why should I feel bad for not sweeping the deck when Will came home for lunch so that spare time allotment went into to making his meal instead?  I felt so good about myself after listing what I had done - validated even.  This made me see just how bad my high-pressure to-do lists were making me feel and I wondered how many other women do this?  

Instead of adding pressure to ourselves, let's give ourselves some recognition and much needed love!  Next time you feel like you're not good enough, take my advice and make a list of things you HAVE done - you'll instantly see that not only are you efficient: you're great at juggling all those spanners that get thrown into the works as well!

this week's tip | try oil pulling

After publicly announcing my eastern medicine preference (and therefore basically declaring myself a hippie), I was thrilled to discover just two days later that oil pulling was taking cyber space by storm with its amazing results! I always want to take any opportunity to advocate for eastern / alternative medicine but not blindly - so I decided to forgo last week's tip to conduct an experiment instead: my own oil pulling experience which I commenced on Sunday 10th March.  Now, just one week later, I am already thrilled with the results and ready to dish out some advice on the matter.

Firstly, for those who don't know what oil pulling is, a very quick explanation is taking a table spoon of oil and swishing it around your mouth for 20 mins.  The purpose is to 'pull out' food particles or bacteria with the oils' sticky texture. Instead of going into details about the procedure, benefits, oil types to be used or success stories, I have linked up various articles that do so much better than I can - most of which are extensively researched on the matter and include references (for you skeptics :P).

My own results are as follows:
- teeth are much whiter (goodbye teeth whitening strips forever!)
- sensitivity gone
- hardly any plaque buildup during the day - teeth constantly feel glassy and clean
- teeth feel thicker and stronger 
- bad breath? what bad breath?  Even the morning breath is gone!
- skin is clearer
- MOST EXCITING (and completely unexpected):: THE WRINKLES AROUND MY EYES ARE DISAPPEARING!!!!!!!!!!!!  I know this is 100% due to the oil pulling because I've not altered my cleansing/ moisturizing routine or diet in anyway.

I've blogged before about coconut oil but for those readers who haven't already rushed out to stores (or THIS website) and bought the magical oil that has so many uses and properties: do so immediately!  Try oil pulling with it:  if only to see whiter teeth after the very first swish and save yourself the $60 you would have otherwise spent on whitening strips.

...If you find the whole thing repulsive or happen to experiment with oils and find another (eg sesame) that works better for you - coconut oil has many non-edible, household uses as well that can be implemented in every home!  From polishing metals to conditioning leather - there's really no limit to what it can do.

this week's tip | give

It has been written freely you have received, so freely give - Matthew 10:8.  And in my own quest for spirituality, God and purpose I have found several sources that actually claim giving to be the purpose.  All I know is wonderful things happen when you detach yourself from things and are willing to share everything you have with everyone around you.  Giving thanks to the universe or God for all that you have actually starts to bring you even more.  Once you understand that, you can't help but share.

this week's tip | trust your intuition

New Age concepts are becoming increasingly popular and we've all heard the key ones: learn to love yourself, thoughts become things, healthy body = healthy mind; but my favourite one is trust yourself and your intuition.

What that means to me is taking a moment to be still and listen to the quiet voice within you - the one that gives you good or bad feelings about decisions you are making at any given moment.  I know this feeling is stronger (more prevalent) in some people but just like a muscle: this part of you grows the more you put it to work.  

Being a somewhat hot headed person by nature (fire sign Aries), I've 'gone with my gut' and trusted my intuition for as long as I can remember.  I've always been able to respect the opinions of others but never let them lead me anywhere I haven't wanted to go.  Over the years, my 'moment taking' procedure has decreased to a nano-second procedure because my instinct (the very first feeling you have about something) is intertwined with my quiet voice and I trust it implicitly.  Of course nothing is perfect 100% of the time but you can choose to see 'mistakes' as lessons: somehow things always work themselves out because nothing is awful 100% of the time either. Besides you'll never know if the path not taken would have been worse...

The best thing about trusting yourself how confidence building it is.  You're in control.  You know best.  It's your life, your lessons, your mistakes, your rewards.  You would never want anything bad for yourself so trust that voice within!  Start with something small, like taking a minute to really ask yourself what you want for dinner, once you have the answer eat that no matter what and then see how you feel afterwards.  You will never make yourself sick if you listen to that voice.  I promise.

this week's tip | find your signature fragrance

One thing I vividly remember about my great-grandmother is Chanel No.5.  Even though she passed away when I was 10 - every time I catch a hint of that perfume, she's right beside me once more.  To me, scent and sound are the most memory evoking senses.  You know like when you hear a song you haven't heard in ages then you're suddenly right back in your high school boyfriend's car and feeling those exact same butterflies that have long since passed (partly due to hindsight).

But my great-grandmother was a very classy lady.  Other memories I have of her include tulips, crystal ware, fine china, rubies and fur.  None have that same emotive response of her signature fragrance though and I often think of how nice it would be to have someone remember me that way.  To have my scent entwined with their impression of me for the remainder of their life.  According to Harper's Bazaar, it's one of the top 10 things every woman (but I think men too) should have before turning 30.

I'm sure if you asked my high school boyfriend what his fragrance association with me is, he would say Chanel's Coco Mademoiselle.  He bought that perfume for me twice in the three years we spent together and I wore it most days (the great thing about Chanel is how long lasting it is - one spray is all you need).  But sadly, my own association of him is now mingled with that heavenly scent so it's my fragrance no longer.

Maybe if you asked some of my girlfriends they would say Estee Lauder's Pleasures, Gucci's Flora, Ralph Lauren's Ralph or YSL's Babydoll.  But I have spent most of my 20's with Will.  He knows me better than anyone, so if you were to ask him (which I did earlier today) he says that while I often flirt with different fragrances, my true love in this arena and signature fragrance is actually: Sarah Jessica Parker's Lovely.  Sort of anti-climatic I know.  Maybe even a let-down... and although I realize it's of an inferior quality to an oil-based perfume, I adore this fragrance like no other!  It's sexy for night-time, fun for the day and sort of comforting when I'm sad...

So Will's probably right and, unlike my great-grandmother's timeless elegance and class that lingers long after she's gone, what will linger after me is a musky, vanilla-ry, uplifting, one of a kind, pretty but inexpensive perfume.  Fitting.

this week's tip | try coconut oil

coconutbenefits.ca

My skin's been dry this week.  Despite my usually successful moisturizing routine, I've been waking up in the mornings to dry skin and having to reapply moisturizer during the day which I've never had to do before.  It might be due to the heater constantly running inside or maybe the drastic temperature changes outside which are also drying.  What ever the reason for it: it sucks!

In a moment of frustration yesterday as I was reapplying face cream in the afternoon, I remembered coconut oil: which the skin therapist I was working with in Atlanta recommended for my skin type, saying it would be perfect as a moisturizer, wrinkle preventor and (with its antibacterial properties) a pimple treater.  I'd forgotten all about this but I used coconut oil religiously for months until summer hit in full force and wasn't seeping into my skin as well as it used to, so I moved it into the kitchen as a healthy frying oil instead.

I must say, it did the trick! I woke up this morning with smooth, velvety skin.  But if that doesn't convince you - you'll be pleased to know that after just a little research online, I've discovered that many celebrities also use coconut oil as a face, body and hair moisturizer and each of them swear by its success as well!  Miranda Kerr, Jennifer Anniston, Angelina Jolie, Gisele Bundchen and Gwenyth Paltrow just to name a few.

There are so many wonderful uses for coconut oil - from beauty and skin care to the kitchen.  I'm confidant that if you try it: you'll love it!

PS: if you're like Will and can't tolerate the lovely smell of raw coconuts, you can find an oil that has virtually no scent, like Spectrum 

if you're like me and can't get enough of the smell that instantly transports you to a tropical island and you envision yourself in a bikini with tan skin and surrounded by white sand: try a super-frangranced one like Carrington Farms:

sarahscucinabella.com 

A girl's guide to surviving the Super Bowl

huffingtonpost.com

Most American girls I know aren't crazy about football but watch the Super Bowl anyway because it's such a big and proud American tradition.  Over the three years I've spent in America I've realized that boycotting the Super Bowl, its half-time show and elaborate commercials is basically sacrilegious. Every conversation for a week afterwards is always about the game and you feel like a goose if you can't join in.

Although if you're like me and watch the game to appease your man - be it a bf, a date, someone you're trying to impress or your husband - I've compiled some tips to help any girl survive those four hours coming up this Sunday game day and earn serious points with your man!

*  Get snacks!  Snacks make everything more enjoyable plus guys typically don't think of this but love when we do! Chicken wings or an antipasti selection are the best options for carb conscious diets and are the most likely to be enjoyed by all.

*  This one should be a no-brainer but while you can enjoy the eye candy during the game: don't point out any cute guys!  You may think making the guy jealous is a good way to get his attention but trust me, it's a big turn off and will prevent any unnecessary tension.

*  Give the commercials a chance - honestly some of these ads are seriously cool!  (Like those Budweiser ads with the Clydesdale horses and this year: a puppy and the horse are best pals. The Muppet ones are always funny too).  

All the ads for all the products are more elaborate with the added perk for those of us in relationships:
your man is 100 times more likely to approve the purchase of a product you haven't budgeted for 
if it's advertised during the Super Bowl!  

*  Everyone goes on about the Half Time show and for the past two years they've been quite controversial - but this year's Half Time won't be hard at all to get into with the Red Hot Chilli Peppers and Bruno Mars!  I've never met a single person who doesn't like one of those.

*  If you're at home and absolutely can't stand it - give yourself a manicure in front of the TV Guys don't know that you aren't really watching, they'll just be excited that you're there beside them.

*  Don't read or play with your phone - these things are too obvious and bug guys who love to think we are paying attention to the biggest deal in their life at present: The Super Bowl!

Good luck ladies! 

This week's tip | Always bring a hostess gift

I love giving and receiving hostess gifts!  Ironically, although this universal tradition is one of the first rules of dinner party etiquette: it's also the first to be overlooked.

A hostess gift is simply a token of appreciation for the person or couple who have gone to the effort of having you over and preparing dinner.  It can be as simple as flowers, a bottle of wine, dessert or something longer lasting like fancy hand soap, cushion or vase: basically anything relating to home or entertaining.

The best hostess gift I've ever received was a lavender Carrière Frères candle but getting flowers is always fun too!  

At the end of the day any thoughtful gesture shows the invitation is appreciated and will definitely score you brownie points with the hosts. (but if you're really stuck - google hostess gifts and a whole bunch of great ideas pop up ;)